Taking things personally when people say something is one thing while getting personally hurt by a misery is quite another. These two things can spoil happiness and can bring rollercoaster emotions out from a person. I’d like to share my take on both in this blog.
Sensitive people get hurt easily by the words of the other and can take things real personal straight to their heart. They hurt themselves in the long run and constantly live in pain and guilt. It is not in their very nature to forget things easily and hence their emotions are always in the waves of highs and lows. Most importantly, they have false hopes of wanting to do an impossible thing in their life and that is: “UNDO” the wrongs they did or the guilt they faced.
Please note being sensitive towards others feeling is authentic and compassionate, while being sensitive towards yourself is just doubting your individuality. Get rid of all the bosses, be it the wounds or scars or anything that victimize you as a person.
- Harsh words of others, exasperating state of affairs, tantrums does not define the person who you are. Do not cling into the situation be it your fault or no fault, try to deal with it and move ahead. Be it an irate boss, broken or insane relationship, do not victimise yourself and have a self doubting quality.
- Self-doubt, fear, anxiety will lower your confidence in yourself and trust in others. Trust and Peace are two major contributing factors for love. Be compassionate and at peace with yourself.
- Do not exaggerate the situation. Because, once you exaggerate, your mind creates and stores the imagination and echoes it back to you again and again until you believe it to be your reality. But, the truth is that it is you who believe it to be true. It becomes your problem whereas actually it is not your problem but theirs. Guard your heart, your thoughts and your imagination from all the bosses.
Coming to the later, Misery is also a circumstance not your disposition,
Two weeks before, I met my neighbour, a 70 year old woman, who used to be loud story teller and an orthodox personality, yet a lady with mystic smile. That day she looked pale, depressing and I also could observe that she had lost so much weight. Having a conversation with her, I came to know the real reason behind her condition that she lost her husband over five months ago. She’d been deeply hurt by that, heard from her that she was married at the age of 17, and had been living her life with her husband for nearly fifty-three years. She said she lost interest towards life and was hapless. I spoke nothing in return not knowing how to console her, just had let her talk about it. After grieving for nearly half an hour, she started the healing talk by herself, that she lived proudly with him amongst others, that he was the best thing to happen in her life and he did everything for her and was so affectionate, that she was very satisfied in her wedded life.
I could get the message from her and was expecting this resilience from her on her own. Being a sanguine by nature, she will move on and knows how to live rest of her life positively. The next half an hour she was talking about how she will invest time and take care of her personal hygiene. Many a times, we will need this maturity in our lives to face challenges. The challenge is to face the problem with resilience, and to cope up with the same maturity till the end and move forward in life. Read :25 Reasons why sadness is necessary for happiness
Situations like this are the real sensitive and toughest ones to accept, learn from and overcome from, without actually losing yourself or by being personally hurt once for all. Taking things with the flow not letting it wreck your heart is the solution. But in order to arrive at the solution, use the right formula which will work best for you. Love yourself and let love in. There is no wrong in grieving and there is no wrong, if healing takes time provided you are already on. Stay Happy! Wake Joy!